inthefade:

This is my favorite day of the year, number wise. Because everything comes together.

2 and 4 are my favorite numbers, and both numbers I associate with the color brown. And brown is a soft color, and they are soft numbers. November is a soft month and also associated with brown. The only way this could be better is if the 24th fell on a Thursday, which is also brown and a soft day. It’s all very earthy. Like everything is good. They are comfortable numbers and a comfortable sounding month. 2. 4. November. They feel right together. Like a blanket. Or a lullabye.

I have on idea how to explain any of this to you. It just is.

This post feels like a great big bed of cumulus clouds.  I love it.

jonathaneunice:

What crap should you eat? This flowchart should help.

(via Twitter » @jyarmis : newyork.grubstreet.com)

I wish that I could get this installed as a heads-up display in my car.

Just kidding.

(Kind of.)

piscesinpurple:

donchiefnerd:

piscesinpurple:

Me, at 7: Mom? Who’s Herbert Hoover?

Mom: A former president.

Me: Everybody liked him, right?

Mom: I don’t know about that. His name is forever attached to The Great Depression.

Me: Are you sure? Because I really think he’s that guy who died in his sleep on Archie and Edith’s couch.

Dam!

Yeah. My childhood was interesting. When I was ten I told my mom I wanted to write my PhD thesis comparing Matthew from Anne of Green Gables to Kreb from Clan of the Cave Bear. At the time it seemed like a totally reasonable idea.

Wow.  I, too, had an interesting childhood.  It involved me not attending 6th grade, and instead writing essays on a great host of topics.  During that time I got my hands on a copy of Clan of the Cave Bear and started obsessing.  Like, really obsessing.  I built a “cave” in the back yard out of tree limbs and old hospital blankets, and insisted on living in it.  My mom was what you would call “permissive” (read crazy) so I did indeed “live” in my “cave” for a couple months.  Also, I got all spiritually anguished because I knew that I would never be morally capable of killing an animal with my hard-earned, kick-ass sling skills.

I guess what I’m saying is that I was a freak.

I really did turn out semi-normal in the end, though.  Seriously. (But somewhere, I still have my “amulet.”)

I suspect I’m oversharing.  I’ll stop.

God…is that book even readable for adults?  I can’t bring myself to find out because I suspect it’s probably abominable.

sloganeerist:

Fuck you, Kansas.

Aww…look who’s grouchy.

Sleep tight, Memphis.  After all, you can’t lose every time we play, right?  It’ll happen for you someday. Probably.

misseffieb:

shoesonwrong:

christiannightmares:

Christian rappers perform a song about the dangers of full frontal hugging.

GIMME THAT CHRISTIAN SIDE-HUG, THAT CHRISTIAN SIDE-HUG!

Ryan’s response was merely to sigh in defeat when I asked him for a Christian side-hug.

But… but I thought… I… but this is… but…

“Jesus never hugged NOBODY LIKE THAT!”

…

…

*brain trickles out of ear*

I guess Jesus is down with fake gunshot/sirens sound effects.  Guns, not hugs.

milkglassmao:

Your dashboard might be dusty and the floors unvacuumed, but you look better than your predecessor, The Pimpernel, who my coworker nicknamed “The Mobile Midden.”

The Mobile Midden.  Priceless.  Ten-thousand several hearts for this!

eoporto:

I need someone to yell at me til I’m out the door.

I need someone to chase me with a weapon til I’m out the door…and then for a couple miles after that.  Preferably someone really menacing — I can’t be bothered to get off the couch for anything less than, say, a very burly Hannibal Lecter.  Or someone with a chainsaw.  Yes, that might do it.  Until then, please pass the chocolate truffles.

Republican National Committee spokeswoman Gail Gitcho on the RNC’s health insurance plan, which covers elective abortion.
But wait, it gets better! Cigna, the company that covers the RNC, says that it offers its customers the opportunity to opt out of abortion coverage and they decided not to opt out.
(via jimray)

I wish I could reblog this a thousand times.

(via spratt)

abbyjean:

As usual, if you want to get anything done in America, step one is to sacrifice the mental and physical health of women by making it an Abortion Issue.  So although HR 218 passed about forty minutes ago, it passed with an amendment which prohibits any insurance company receiving federal funds from covering abortions.  This has the charming effect of probably killing insurance coverage for abortion altogether, notes NARAL:

The Stupak-Pitts amendment makes it virtually impossible for private insurance companies that participate in the new system to offer abortion coverage to women. This would have the effect of denying women the right to use their own personal private funds to purchase an insurance plan with abortion coverage in the new health system — a radical departure from the status quo. Presently, more than 85 percent of private-insurance plans cover abortion services.

Charmingly I expect that in the next few days all your liberal dude friends will be trying to explain to you that this is really no big deal, look, they had to get the Republicans onboard SOMEHOW, this is just a battle but we won the war, etc etc.  It all makes me want to crawl back up across the border.  Why don’t these men ever notice that their go-to bargaining chip is women’s bodies?  And if they do notice, why doesn’t it bother them? (harpyness)